Comments on: Sometimes you have to say no. Sometimes you have to say yes.

By: Beauty as Discipline « Holistic Vanity

Beauty as Discipline « Holistic Vanity — Fri, 14 May 2010 19:14:50 +0000

[...] my clients said to me recently “I try to do everything – and look at my skin!”. Chantel Simmons blogged about the same thing writing “I can never say no. I say yes to everything. And then I end [...]

By: Janine

Janine — Tue, 11 May 2010 02:35:48 +0000

I’m a classic “YES-er.” I say YES so much that my e.mail inbox is giving me hives — the shakes even. But what you say is so true, and I thank you for making the point: whatever I’ve said YES to has lead to so much more learning, so much more sharing. I’d not be here if it weren’t for YES. And now that I’m grateful for YES instead of resentful and self-flagellate-y, perhaps saying appropriate NOs will be easier. Amazing what a girl can do when she leaves guilt in the dust, yes?

By: chantel

chantel — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 02:22:22 +0000

Joanne: That’s really good insight on when to say no and when to say yes. Thanks for sharing!

By: Joanne McBay

Joanne McBay — Sat, 17 Apr 2010 19:56:13 +0000

People comment a lot on how many things I’ve done in my life because I have said yes alot too. It has been an amazing blessing. I’ve even traveled on organization’s tabs to Europe and Peru. I’ve found the trick to saying no is being honest “my plate is full right now”, or because I am a teacher and many people want me to do things that are too much like my day job I say “I do that on a daily basis so I look for something to refresh my mind/spirit when I volunteer. Maybe you could try asking the local (insert name of a college, church or high school).” I say yes when my inner spirit perks up and says “cool” when it hears the suggestion. When it says “blah” or “run away!” I say “What a lovely offer but I’m afraid I have to say no.” When you do say no, soften the blow by suggesting someone else or at least another organization the person can go to for assistance/volunteers.

By: chantel

chantel — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 19:06:15 +0000

Bonnie: I think the trouble is knowing when something really is something you should just say no to. Like how many times can you do something just as a favour, even when you don’t get anything out of it? Someone told me that if it’s really not going to be at all fun or worthwhile and you’re going to dread it then you just have to say no, but how do you say no without hurting someone’s feelings? That’s my problem.

Claudia: omg — you’re so sweet! and I always want to help you, so not to worry! But I’d like your tip on how do you say no?

By: Bonnie

Bonnie — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 19:03:07 +0000

Very interesting post, Chantel! I often find myself saying “yes” to things that aren’t all that new or interesting, which then gets me too bogged down to go after all those deliciously new “yes” adventures. One thing I’ve forgotten is how fortunate we are to be able to have these opportunities to explore, share and reach out (even baking last-minute brownies or proofing a friend’s resume). So I’m trying to be more aware of what I’m “yessing” to. After all, yessing is a blessing.

By: claudia, vintage muse

claudia, vintage muse — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 22:28:17 +0000

Well, I truly hope you don’t start saying NO because the amount of things I ask from you – today, prime example – who would I ask?

I think all your Yessing is what makes you a really great teacher. Not only a teacher teacher, like in the classroom, but plain and simple a person we can learn from. You’re right, all your experiences and the many tasks you’ve taken on has made you the bundle of knowledge that you are.

You’ve helped me with so many different things, and not only do you help me, but you do so very quickly which is always the astonishing part. You’re someone people can rely on, and get advice from, and the best part is you never make anyone feel as if they’re being a pain in your ass, even when they might be *cough cough, me, today…*

The point is, your yessness is inspiring and if more people said yes they’d enrich their lives and those of others, for sure.

I probably say no more than yes, so I’m going to try and be more of a yesser. Like you.

You’re completely appreciated, so don’t ever feel like your yessing isn’t worth something xo